Rejection Handled My Career

 3 months have passed since I have returned here which leaves me wondering where I could possibly begin.

As you all know by now, I packed the entirety of my life into 2 suitcases and set sail to the land of the unknown.

I had no idea where I was going, how I would survive the next 7 days with $10 to my name and not a single familiar face to guide me.

It was time I proved to my company that I am to be taken seriously. That my child like face deserves to be here just as much, if not more than they do.

Saying goodbye to my family, my friends, the scent of home was heart breaking but every nerve in my body told me that it was time for me to take control of this narrative. It was my time to be the author of my own novel. 

No longer was I to be the daughter of a crackhead. No longer was I to be just a telemarketer. No Longer was I to be the psycho ex of a drug addict. No longer was I to be defined by everyone else's actions.

I am Samara Ward and I say that so proudly.

Call after call, script after script, objection after rejection. I was tired of feeling so unimportant, so useless. How can someone with all this wisdom and passion settle for a 9-5 that doesn't benefit anyone but the company owners?

After travelling to Canberra and speaking out at Parliament about topics I was passionate about made me yearn for this fulfilling life where I can truly implement change. Or at least be a valuable member of a team where my opinion matters.

I can't explain to you in words the euphoric sensation that comes after standing amongst a crowd of people crying at the words you spoke.

For the first time I was heard and for the first time I knew there was something inside me that had to be shared with the rest of the world.

Back to the present.

After pushing, arguing and insisting I be given the opportunity I deserve, I was promoted to Sales Development Representative. As you all know that wasn't the role I came here for.

Sure, It was a step in the right direction. I would encourage you all to take it as a win. But, easier said than done, right? I didn't pack up my life, leave everything I know behind and stay isolated and alone for 6 months just to be told that once again, I was not ready. That my age meant I didn't know how a business ran. That clients would never take me seriously.

Momentarily I fell to their beliefs. I began to question whether or not I was as good as I thought I was. Sure, I worked hard. Results were coming in, but, how many times can someone tell you you're not right for that position before you start to agree?

Although COVID restrictions had lifted and I had found the love and friendship here in Sydney I had yearned for, I felt disappointed. This luxurious, successful life that I told everyone I WOULD achieve, wasn't in the palm of my hands anymore.

My employer rejected my Account Management application 3 times.

If anyone knew me in the past, they know how short lived my calmness used to be.

Once I would feel like my efforts aren't being seen I would erupt. Growing up in a household where every member is unable to communicate in a healthy manner, made it difficult in my teens and young adulthood to manage my moods and feelings.

I knew moving here that I wanted to be different. 

There's no excuses anymore for being angry. Sure, my family absolutely neglected me. 90% of my friendships have not only done me dirty but completely crossed ever moral and ethical line imaginable - especially my step fathers. I have seen enough trauma and tragedy to immobilise anyone. 

Guess what though, everyone has a tragic story. Everyone has someone dying or an incurable illness. Their sisters dad killed themselves, their mother is cheating on their father, they were molested as a child.

My experiences don't give me permission to be a shitty friend or a shitty daughter or an unreliable employee. There is only so long you can mope around for and blame everyone else for your unhappy lifestyle.

I was sick and tired of accepting the fact that Account Management just wasn't for me.

Putting my feelers out with other companies online, to my surprise a recruitment agency reached out to me.

Seeing in the subject section, "Account Management Position", I freaked.

*stay calm, stay calm, stay calm*.

After a few days of going back and forth I was invited to the initial interview.

I spent days preparing for it - Researching, notes, flash cards, you name it.

A week had passed and something wasn't sitting right. I then received a call to say the position was on hold till February 2022.

*sigh*

This had to be a sign. I really thought this time it was going to work in my favour and once again the rejection hit hard.

What am I doing here?!

Why did I think that I could do this!?

I can't do this.

Instead of complaining I decided to look into changing careers completely. Being in sales so long, I had created an interest in real estate. The idea of selling properties rather than products really enticed me.

A month had passed and I had practically given up on being an Account Manager. Sure, I continued to put feelers out but that drive and determination that I had when I came to Sydney had vanished.

One miserable day at work in June 2022, I received another call from the recruitment agency.

Fast forward another week and I went from Sales Development Representative to Account Manager.

I can't express to you in that moment the amount of tears that flooded my eyes.

This warm wave of empowerment had cloaked me entirely.

"Me? Me? ME!? What? I did it? Samara.. Ward... Account Manager?".

The grin that stretched from one side of Australia to the other causing my cheeks to ache.

My poor neighbours probably nearly called 000 after hearing me scream so loud.

My entire life I have felt like I have had to work a little harder than everyone else due to a range of factors. For years I thought I was only as good as my parents and my friends. Even with all this success it can be hard to accept when I think about where I came from.

As you all know, this has been a lonely journey. I have met some incredible people. Ones who have taught me financial and business growth, personal improvement and how to determine which battles to fight.

This adventure certainly hasn't gone smoothly - but is anyones?

Bloggers, it doesn't matter how you reach your goal. Whether you go an alternative route or fly there instead of driving, all that matters is that you make it and you're happy in the way you're doing it.

I made more than a dozen sacrifices in my time to try and be the best version of myself that I can be with the tools, knowledge and skills that I have - I survived the worst.

Sometimes my methods may not be ones that we all agree with but I found a way to protect myself and to carry myself and my loved ones to safety. 

Use your pain to heal, not to hurt.

Never allow anyone to tell you that you aren't good enough, unable or undeserving of something that you want or need in this life.

Never allow 1 or even 9 rejections to keep you from the goal you fought ever so hard to achieve.

NEVER believe in what OTHERS think of you. You can only trust yourself in this world. 

It's okay to let people in but always remember who pulled you out of the mud when no one else would... It was always you. 

From my city to yours x