More THAN -

Always been "that girl".

The hand that spoon feeds all and exhaled like toxic bullshit from the mouthes of those I had fed.

Opening up to a small, secluded group of people about my life and the same island of "friends" having so much to say about the only support system they ever wanted. Unlike me, not the only support system they needed.

When you grow up in a war zone your gut instinct, your insides scream at you to defend what it yours. You are at war with everyone. It is you and you only against the world.

I can't possibly image anyone being able to understand this. Even alone, a battle is calling.

The silence, the yells, the thumping, the pounding sound of destruction or anger or madness.

Being used, being spoken of is nothing but familiarity. Nothing but a chain of reactions.

Always viewed as the one that birthed me. So far from the truth and so far from reality but no one will ever know what this is like. Because no one will ever know how it feels to pound away at your key - typing being the only way to express yourself because no one. no one. GIVES. A. FUCK.

The sweetest sips of the bitterest wine being the antidote to a temporary release to the friends, to the enemies, to the family that "care".

This Title wave is ever so consuming. Filling me whole, erupting like a no longer dormant volcano.

All the future dreams, the past mistakes, all concocted into one, ball of fury. Of light. Of Darkness.

The rose between the thorns.

The treasure at the end of the rainbow.

I am more than what I have seen. I am more than what you believe. I am MORE. You are MORE.

The deep breaths I am forced to take in order to maintain sanity, reminding me of how far I have come, how far I will go and the greatness I will supply to those around me.

I will NEVER be the woman in the red dress. I will never be the woman you want me to be. I will always be me.

Bloggers,

Do you too have those disempowering you? Trying to dim what is rightfully yours? The light, the beauty that fulfils you from the insides out?

Remember always, you are as good as you make yourself. Do not allow the disrespect or the immaturity of a negative person ruin your day. 

Only sad people want to hurt others. Only miserable people have nasty things to say. Most importantly, insecure people will alway give off an image that they are not and will do whatever it takes to make you feel less than. Remember you are MORE than.

Use your shield to defend yourself. You are your greatest weapon.